Hervey Bay

On Monday 2nd July we had to drive to Melbourne arriving approx 7.00pm, we stayed at the Holiday Inn at the Melbourne Airport. This hotel could not accomodate our family of 5 with 5 beds so we had to get by with 2 Queen beds. Brett and Kayne had one bed and Rylie, Maddi and myself shared the other. What a night, Rylie fell out of bed twice as Maddi pushed her to the edge all the time, I didn't sleep at all as Maddi thought the bed was all for her. Kayne got out of his bed at one stage and slept on the floor with his head in a cupboard to try and drown out Brett's snoring. Our alarm woke us at 6.30am, as you could imagine there was alot of tired grumpy people boarding our plane.

On Tuesday 3rd July we caught 2 planes to get to Hervey Bay QLD. First was from Melbourne to Sydney then from Sydney to Fraser Coast Hervey Bay.

We arrived at Hervey bay at 1.15pm with my best friend Nikki and her family meeting us.

from left: Lily (my god daughter), Nikki, her mum Carol and Jack

We spent the whole 7 days with Nikki as we only see each other once a year, we had a lot of catching up to do. the reason for our tip was Nikki's 40th birthday. This birthday went longer than the Packer wedding.

Nikki had a fancy dress party on the Saturday Night. What an absolute hoot. She is the only 5ft female I know who would try and pull off Laura Croft (Angelina Jole - Tomb Raider) and get away with it.

Brett went as the Pope, he was hilarious, he was snapped here eye balling Paris Hiltons necklace.

Everyone was there, Shrek and Princess Fiona, The Beverly Hill Billies, The Bundy Bear, Borat, Mel Malinga, Anna from Abba, Pink, Ozzie Osbourne, Austin Powers, Felicity Shagwell, Robin Hood, Maralyn Monroe, Sony and Cher, President Clinton and Monica Lewinsky, Paris Hilton and many more.

We spent lots of time on the beach, although most of you know I hate sand so I sat on the beach Cafe (outdoor cafe) and watched alot from the balcony. There was always something happening, beach cricket was a hoot, soccer, and Bernie bought his jet ski out for a play.

Chris, Myself & Nikki at the outdoor Beach Cafe.

Whilst we were in Hervey Bay we were paid a visit from Peter Holt, Peter spent the day with mum and stayed for dinner with us at Nikki's house. He gave me a quick lesson on how to write Poems. So rather than do a speach for Nikki (I was asked by her father to do a speach) I wrote a Poem, I tried to sum up her life as I saw it in 13 versus, I did do well even if I do say so myself. Maybe in my next post I might grace you all with it.

2007 Kart Nationals

CARNAGE ON THE TRACK

Cool Slideshows As per the famous words of Kayne "IT WASN'T MY FAULT"

Sydney Easter 2007

Cool Slideshows

As most of you know the Hughes's took off to Eastern Creek NSW for the 2007 Natioanl Kart Titles. We stayed at the Rooty Hill RSL.
Rylie, Maddison, Myself, Donna (another mother) and her daughter Celine decided to go on an adventure, we sussed out where the train station was and caught a train to Sydney for a little site seeing. We had a fantastic day, catching a double decker train to Sydney Central, we walked to Darliing Harbour and caught a Monorail around a bit of the City. We then made our way to Circular Quay, where we watched buskers and had lunch. We then caught a Ferry across to Darling Harbour and back to Circular Quay, just so we could go under the Sydney Harbour Bridge. We decided we wanted to go across the bridge so we took the easy way out and caught a train across and back. Don't think this travelling on public transport thing happened easily, we had a lot of laughs, what should have taken 3-4 hours out of day took us 9 hours. We left the Hotel at 9.00am and returned 6.15pm ( We only got a little lost)(Sometimes). Donna M is born and bred in the Country and has never caught public transport in her life, therfore the whole day relied on me trying to figure out where to go and how to get there.

Rylie's First Race

It's finally happened, my little princess has finally won the battle, after 18 months of me saying no to my girls racing Go-Karts, I gave in. I gave in on the provision she is only to race Club Days and NO Open Meetings
Rylie had her first race on Sunday 18th March. It was quite a good day to start as there was 9 in the race - 4 of which had driven and raced before. There was 5 'P' platers (3 of which were girls) You could say the 'P' platers had there own race. I did take my camera with the intention of taking lots of photo's but as it turned out Kayne was racing before her and I had to watch his race and collect him and his kart.

Not only was the 18th of March Rylie's first race but it was also Brett and mine 18 year wedding anniversary. We had a lovely, romantic day (NOT) at the Go-Kart track, the evening before we dined at the tracks canteen, sitting on McDonalds table and chairs, I had the Chicken Parma and Brett had the mixed grill. It was OH so Romantic.

Hamilton Island

Firstly I'll start off with a quick joke -

A good looking man walked into an agent's office in Hollywood and said I want to be a movie star." Tall, handsome and with experience on Broadway, he had the right credentials.
The agent asked, "What's your name?"
The guy said, "My name is Penis van Lesbian."
The agent said, "Sir, I hate to tell you, but in order to get into Hollywood , you are going to have to change your name."
I will NOT change my name! The van Lesbian name is centuries old, I will not disrespect my grandfather by changing my name. Not ever." The agent said, "Sir, I have worked in Hollywood for years... you will NEVER go far in Hollywood with a name like Penis van Lesbian! I'm telling you, you will HAVE TO change your name or I will not be able to represent you." "So be it! I guess we will not do business together" the guy said and he left the agent's office.

FIVE YEARS LATER..... The agent opens an envelope sent to his office.
Inside the envelope is a letter and a check for $50,000. The agent is awe-struck, who would possibly send him $ 50,000? He reads the letter enclosed...


"Dear Sir, Five years ago, I came into your office wanting to become an actor in Hollywood , you told me I needed to change my name. Determined to make it with my God-given birth name, I refused. You told me I would never make it in Hollywood with a name like Penis van Lesbian. After I left your office, I thought about what you said. I decided you were right. I had to change my name. I had too muc h pride to return to your office, so I signed with another agent. I would never have made it without changing my name, so the enclosed check is a token of my appreciation.

Thank you for your advice..


Sincerely,


Dick van Dyke



I don't care who you are, that's funny)

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HAMILTON ISLAND FEB 2007

What can I say "PARADISE", 7 days of doing absolutely nothing, other than relaxing by one of the many, many pools. Bretts favourite was the swim up pool bar, mine on the other hand was what I called the rock pool. This was the pool the kids loved and would stay in for hours at a time, this is why I loved it. Every now and then I had to move as my back was sore from lying on it.

The weather was very tropical, rain, sun, cloud, sunshine, the humidity was terrible give me dry heat any day.

Oh yeah, I did do some exercise, 4 out of 7 days the girls and I went kayaking, that was sooo fun, trying to keep the damn thing afloat with Rylie crabbing the oars, once I worked her out we were fine. The last thing I wanted to do was to fall in with the jellyfish.

We were sad to say good bye to Hamilton Island but in another way it was great to be home to the 38 degree dry heat.

Concert Night

One extremely hot Jan evening the crowd gathered for an accoustic concert.




The girls - left to right - Jordan, Rylie,Chloe, Claire and Maddison.
In the afternoon they chose there songs, Robbie Williams - Better Man, Daniel Powter - Bad Day and Shannon Noll - What about me. They practiced with the real music and artists and then Tim came along with his guitar.
They did each song, word for word (they had the lyrics in front of them) it was absolutely beautiful.
(You know when you get that little tear in the corner of your eye and you can't talk - that was me)

Tim starring on guitar

Jason had the rythm egg, he did so well not to spill any of that red.

The Chocolate Factory

While the boys were out doing what boys do, the girls decided to do what girls do. We got the Chocolate Fountain out of the christmas box, melted heaps of chocolate, cut up lots of fruit and dunked and chewed til we couldn't dunk and chew anymore.
We had fresh strawberries, pineapple, cantelope, watermelon and grapes and of course marshmallows. What a mess these things can make.

Cool Slideshows

Happy New Year to Everyone

Happy New Year to everyone.

I must say my Christmas was quite a hectic one. From Boxing Day until 4 Jan I had 18 people staying at my house. We kicked everyone out so we could nick off to Echuca for 5 days to visit other friends and have a bit of a break ourselves. Upon returning home I had a phone call with friends letting me know they were on there way, so up until yesterday (Sunday 28 Jan) we have not had a day or a night alone.

Christmas Day



We had a great Christmas Day with my mum 'Jen' staying Christmas eve and waking up with the kids. Gwen and Brian joined us for lunch. We surprised everyone with an Entre of prawns and lobster, followed by a traditional roast lunch (with the meat being cooked in the BBQ), finished off with Plum Pudding, Cream, Ice cream and custard.

Afterwards retiring to lounge for a nap

What's happened in December

Griswalds move over, the Hughes's are in town.
We are the only house in our street with Christmas Lights (so far). I must say I did do well. This year we have added the Merry Christmas sign, Of course the critic (BE) says we need more, but you can only have so many extention leads and power boards at your front door.

We've had a busy December. We started off at the Grand Hyatt for the weekend, for an Awards night. Brett and I caught up with our friends Sharon and Steve in the city on Friday night and I spent Saturday trying to finish off some Chrissy shopping in Melbourne, I only had to return once to the hotel for a drop off. The evening was full of fun, plenty of dancing and drinking was done by all.

Kayne has finished Karting for the year but our life is still hectic with Rylie and her swimming. She had her fist comp last Sunday, she raced for club points at our local pool, 3rd place freestyle, 4th backstroke, 4th breast stroke, considering she has only trained the once she did quite well.

Maddison also joined the swimming club although she can only swim 25m comfortably, she struggles with 50m, she also is a little power house in the pool.

Maddison graduated from a Gumnut to a Bluebell within the Girl Guides under the Guides new flag pole with the Australian Flag flying high. (Another certificate for the POOLROOM).

Above are photos of our time down the river last weekend, as well as photos of Maddisons pool party.

Merry Christmas

Scroll down and you'll see Santa's willy! .

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For Crying out loud.........

Act your age........

there is no Santa

A Few Jokes

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Gay Flight Attendant

My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.

As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that "Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be Landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just Put your trays up, that would be super." On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather Exotic looking woman that hadn't moved a muscle.

"Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines, but I asked you to raise your trazy poo, so the main man can pity-pat us down on the ground." She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one."To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, "Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I out rank you."
"Tray Up, Bitch."
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WHY I FIRED MY SECRETARY...

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "happy birthday!", and possibly have a present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "happy birthday." I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids will remember. My kids came into breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and somewhat despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, "good morning, boss, happy birthday!" It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered. I worked until one o'clock and then Jane knocked on my door and said, "you know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go out to lunch, just you and me." I said, "Thanks Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go!" We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. We dined instead at a little place with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously on the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day... We don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind?" She said, "Let's go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment Jane turned to me and said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for a moment. I'll be right back." Ok." I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes; she came out carrying a huge birthday cake...

Followed by my wife, kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "happy birthday". And I just sat there ...

On the couch....

Naked...

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This fellow was so deeply in love that just before he was married, he had his bride's name tattooed on his love muscle.

Normally, only the first and last letters were visible, although when he was aroused, the tattoo spelled out W-E-N-D-Y.

Now they're on their honeymoon at a resort in Montego Bay. One night, in the men's room, this fellow finds himself standing next to a tall Jamaican at the urinal.

To his amazement, he notices that this man, too, has the letters W-Y tattooed on his penis. "Excuse me," he says, "but I couldn't help noticing your tattoo. Do you have a girlfriend named Wendy?"

"No way, mon, I work for the Tourist Board. Mine reads, 'Welcome to Jamaica, mon, have a nice day'."

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The Worlds Shortest Fairy Tale

Once upon a time,

a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?"

The girl said, "NO!"

And the guy lived happily ever after and went fishing,

hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer

and farted whenever he wanted.

THE END

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Dam Blogger

I would like everyone to know I do read everyones blog spots but unfortunately I am on Beta (google) and whenever I want to leave comments It always comes up with errors. Every now and then I will get a comment through. Beleive me it gets quite frustrating.

WHO'S THE MANNNNNNN

After racing 3 state titles this year Kayne has finally made TOP TEN.
Kayne and Brett took off to Tasmania to Race the Tasmanian State Titles in Hobart. He competed in 2 classes - Junior National Heavy and Junior Clubman. In the JNH class he came 8th, he had a DNF in the prefinal and had to start 23 for the final and in Junior Clubman (the class I hate) he came 5th.

Your probably wondering why the girls and I didn't go - Because it is soooo dam cold over there.

Oaks Day - Nov 06

Incase you are wondering, yes that's me in the gorgeous brown hat. Just ask and you can borrow it anytime. 10 of us swam across the river to the golf club for Oaks Day, and were entertained by Patsy Downunder (take off of Patsy in Ab Fab). We had the best day. We arrived at 11.00am and left the Golf club for the Ski Club at 7.00pm, we finally arrived home after 11 hours of PINK Champagne in our bellies at 11.00pm. (You might be wondering why Jill is showing her ass, she is actually showing us her bodgy fake tan job). I had a couple of wins for the day and actually came out in front. (That must be because I was a thoroughbred owner for a while there).

FIJI Oct 06

The weekend before we left for Fiji Kayne had the crash of his life. He has had many crashes before each of them I have been calm as we all know Motorsport is dangerous. The crash was a doosey, knocked unconcious whilst still sitting in his kart. Of course I had tears, my baby with a rattled brain (as the doctor put it). He continued to race the next day and ended up 3rd place. I think he was trying to show his Aunty Carol he could do it as she was against him racing. He raced with every rib on his left side cracked and his muscle in his neck torn. Of course he was too sore on Monday to go to school.With cracked ribs and a six hour flight ahead of us we finally made it. The childrens first overseas trip.

The flight over was a night flight we took off from Tullamarine Airport at 11.23pm and arrived Fiji time 7.30am (2 hours time difference)We then had a 1 1/2 hour bus trip to the Naviti resort, that was an experience, we all kissed the ground when we got there.

The Resort was beautiful, it had everything you could imagine, much to Brett, Keith and Wayne's delight there was a Pool Bar. There was plenty of time spent there, each morning us girls would start the day with a Pina Colada and end with the coctail of the day, I tried to drink coctails all day but I felt sick after the first 3rd. We opted for the all inclusive package where all meals, alcohol, 24hour snacks etc were FREE. (well it felt like it). All the girls (kids) had their hair braided, we enjoyed all the resorts facilities. Water sports were included so everyday we canoed, we did archery, played Volley ball, egg catching, watermelon bashing, frog and crab racing, golf you name it we did it. The kids enjoyed the kids club and the 2 massive pools as well as the spa's. I recommend this holiday package to any family that wants an inexpensive holiday (this was cheaper then a 2 week holiday in Queensland).

Cairnes - August 06

Your probably wondering why I am letting you all know about my trips, well I am using this blog as a diary, we do so much travelling with the Go-karts that you forget where you've been and where your going. Your lucky I am only writing about the big trips, wait until next year when I let you know about every weekend.

Anyway this has nothing to do with Karting. In August Brett and I turned 40, and rather than having a party we decided to take off to Cairnes for the weekend. Once we made our bookings we told some friends who decided to join us. Nicky and Bernie flew in from Hervey Bay, Keith and Jacky, Sharon & Steve and Gary & Heather all flew in from Melbourne, we met at the resort. As you could imagine copious amounts of alocohol was consumed.





We did manage some site seeing. Keith & Jacky decided to take off to Green Island for the day and the rest of us decided to hire a car to visit Port Douglas. We couldn't get a people mover all we could manage to hire were 2 little converables from some shonky car yard (Astra & Jeep Wrangler). If you could imagine 8 people of which 6 are over 5'10 (Gary is 6'7) squeezing into these tiny vehicles.


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Dubbo June 06

With quite a few more Vic meetings under our belts we took off to Dubbo for the NSW State Championships. Rylie, Maddison and myself filled in time on practice days by visiting the Dubbo Western Plain Zoo. This is a must see. We did the entire zoo by foot (most people drive or hire buggies). The next day we went to the Old Dubbo Gaol. Maddison was absolutely petrified so we had to cut it short and leave, what do you do with time up your sleeves of course we had to spend the rest of the day at the shops.



With 40 competitors in each of Kayne's classes, they didn't make it easy for him. The bottom left photo is Kayne in the air with his nose cone in the air in front of him, the middle photo is the aftermath as is the next one. (9 kids in total) He finished approximately 14th in the final of 1 class and 17th in the other, both finals he was pushed off and had to recover to finish.

Boliva - Adelaide SA April 06

Once we got back from Hong Kong our year in Go-Karting started. After a few open meetings within Victoria we took off to South Australia to the Boliva International Race Track for the SA State Titles. All state title meetings are quite tuff as only the cream within Australia compete. While Kayne was practicing the girls and I would site see. We visited the Montesaro Zoo which is a safari like zoo. We also went to Haandorf and the Big Rocking Horse. We had another spare day so in true female fashion we took off to Rundal St Mall and shopped our little hearts out. Once racing starts we stay at the track and support our team. Within our team we won 2 state titles, 1 second and 2 thirds, Kayne crossed the line 11th just short of the top ten. We were very proud of his efforts.